A new friend and I started a podcast. We still don’t have a name and we haven’t put our episodes out yet. But it’s been fun. Okay, I’m being shy. It’s been freaking INVIGORATING.
It’s like I’ve tapped into a child spirit of mine that has gone dormant the past three years waiting, other times screaming to be heard, to be seen, and to be held.
Could this be a coincidence that this little child within me is symbolic of the real baby currently growing inside my womb? Whoa.
Does that mean my inner little girl and my real baby girl are emerging at the same time? Maybe even the same week, could it all happen on the same day? Whoa. These are the times when I actually believe there is a God guiding my way, intertwining different aspects of my life into one, in order to communicate a beautiful message to me. That message being something mysterious, mysteriously wonderful. A message that no one can identify from the outside, a message I cannot even identify myself. Yes, I may understand a speck of that message, but it’s one of those things only One other Being knows about because that Being is creating the story, the image, the message, the symbolism of these two little girls breathing inside of me.
No way am I smart enough to dream up something as visceral, as intricate, as intimate as this. No one is. For someone who has been questioning the logical grounds behind my faith lately, a piece of evidence is placed in front of me in order to settle my heart, my worries, my doubts, and pick me back up again, in love.
Laughing attack after laughing attack in our podcasting studio, aka the closet of my bedroom where my panties hang on a shelf above Erin’s head while we sit on little cushions on the floor, drinking seltzers, in our sweatpants, gulping our coffee and matcha drinks obnoxiously into the microphone during a super deep confession. Last Friday, my tiger onesie on the top shelf attacked Erin’s head as it fell from the sky, initiating a neverending laughing fit on the floor. Sometimes our husbands sit in the living room and drink bourbon together as they reflect upon their businesses and dreams together. I don’t know why, but I find this comforting. We cry at the struggles of life, laugh at the ridiculousness of it, and finally have found space, an outlet that grants us permission to be nothing but our crazy little girl selves in a world that pressures us to have it perfectly together all the time.
What about you? If you’re reading this I can assure you you’re someone who looks deeply into life. Into the meaning of life, behind life, your life. Can you identify any symbolism going on? What about curiosity? Are you curious? If so, do you think that curiosity is leading you into something new, something exciting? I know I speak in general terms, but that’s the point. What’s stirring in you? What thoughts are coming up as you read this? I guarantee there’s a thought or two that matters right here, right now. Look into it. Maybe it’s your inner child seeking to break out into the air of freedom. To dance, to play, to scream, and cry around… to create and find joy. Only you know what is surfacing. But here is your chance to discover what it is. Why here. Why now? Where can it be used? What’s the meaning behind it? Should you rest and ponder on it for a while? Or should you jump in headfirst? That’s for me to help stir and for you to tap into.
Two little girls stir and grow within me. What is it that stirs and grows within you?
XOXO,
Kelly.
Two Little Girls
Creating a podcast is wonderful. There’s so many creative aspects to it that really tickle every part of your brain.
I am hoping to build and finish some short stories this year for serializing. It’s only January so there’s still time. 😭